Tuesday, June 26, 2018

D is for Disappointment

Folks, it's been a while.

Half a year flew past, eh? I see and mentally note so much on a daily basis and this is something I've been meaning to write about for a long time.

I see way too many parents these days rushing to cushion their child's life from every angle. So much so that the child does not know what's disappointment, or does not know how to react to rejection or the word 'NO'. Yes, this is happening for real.


Now. I'm all for happy childhoods. Every child deserves a happy and secure environment where they are free to be themselves. Free to be the cheekiest, corniest, craziest version of themselves.

At the outset, I'll be honest. I'm not super perfect mom. Quite far from it by the way.

Yes, my children know how it feels to NOT get their way all the time. They are in multiple scenarios even at home on a weekly or a monthly basis where they realize that a mild level of rejection or disappointment is normal.

Don't fight your child's battles for them. Let them figure out their little strategies for themselves. They'll thank you for it later.

Accountability is the other thing.

Mommies and daddies - make your child accountable for their daily chores or decisions. For example: In our home, my children know to look at their timetable and ensure their PE kit or swimming kit is packed the previous night. Yes, even my 6 year old.

They do realize that if they forget their kit due to laziness then mom i.e Me,  is not going to get into emergency mode and go rushing home to pick and deliver the kit in question.

One main reason why they should learn the basics of accountability is because we parents won't be around to help them forever. And such children who are mollycoddled at home, do end up floundering when thrown into the big bad ocean by themselves because they don't have these basic life skills.

Today's responsible child is tomorrow's sorted adult.

Let your child face life's little situations at a tender age. If possible, share stories with them about children who are not from privileged backgrounds and who have to take life in their stride everyday. Let them understand the value of working hard for something and then receiving the rewards.

It's our duty as parents to empower our children by giving them opportunities to develop basic soft skills, and not decapacitate them by doing everything for them.





Wednesday, March 14, 2018

Staying Afloat

Yup, you read that right. No this post is nothing to do with water or swimming. Ok, I'll be honest. It is is about swimming, but maybe in the context of life. 

Let's face it, noone's life is perfect :) 

I have a couple of friends who are currently going through a physically and emotionally difficult journey in their lives and we share our thoughts with each other on an almost daily basis. The subject for this blog post struck me as I was writing my thoughts in a way that I could be a source of support and light to them. 

We all have ups and downs in our journey of life and on some days it feels like there are more downs. Somehow, everything seems to be going wrong; be it relationships, work, life, kids etc. Sometimes even health? 

I feel like it's then that we have to take a step back and think. It's important to focus on what really kept us going in this journey so far. In the case of relationships, it's imperative to focus on the happy moments and think of them often during those low moments. 

Image result for happiness jar
(Image courtesy Google Images)

This is a wonderful idea shared by many on social media. If maintained regularly, this pretty little happiness jar concept helps us analyse and understand our emotions - and in turn it helps us value what we have rather than worrying about whatever may be out of our control.

Each time you feel like giving up - tell yourself that you won't. Vocal reaffirmations are very powerful !! Remember that there are ALWAYS reasons to stay afloat. Some reasons may be really small to you but they are important. 

Think about what got you through your journey AND what helped you reach this point.Write your thoughts down or draw to express your feelings.

And finally, remember that you are not alone. Find an outlet for your feelings, speak to friends, listen to music and BELIEVE in the power of finding a solution. 


Tuesday, January 9, 2018

Empathy and Being Real

Happy 2018 to all reading this post - May only the best come your way this year!

This post is linked to what I wrote previously on Acceptance.

Being empathetic is really important in this day and age. There is just too much hate in the world right now. What if we tried to treat others the way we'd like to be treated ourselves? What if we only said to others what we'd love to hear being said to us? The world would transform. It's like I always like to say : Every Drop Makes An Ocean.


Last year was a revelation of sorts. Without getting into details - it suffices to say that I evolved as a person in the year that went past.

We all learn everyday. Some lessons are taught to us nicely and some we learn the hard way. Sometimes drawing a line verbally or physically is necessary. Sometimes crossing over a fragile line to give the other person a hug is also equally important - more so when you realise they were literally craving for it.

Something I also learned last year was to let go of expectations. Here it's important to note that I had a lot of unrealistic expectations from myself. I'm not the first mom to multitask and I'll not be the last. Women in the previous generations had it harder because blah blah - but that does not take away from the fact that in this day and age, it's quite tough to present the balancing act. I learned to do only as much as I could handle and take some time to rest. It did wonders for my mood and self-esteem.

And coming to the topic of social media. Yes I'm on social media now more than I ever was. I like observing people and trends. Hands down, I have more respect for people who portray their real selves on social media because it takes guts to do so.

Be real. Show real emotions. Say what you mean and mean what you say (they're both different by the way).

On that note, I'll sign off !







Resurrected

I am back!! I just realized that my last post on this blog was in November 2020! OMG! How have you all been in the third year of the pandemi...